The Invisible Struggles: What Adult Executive Function Challenges for Women Feels Like
- Brittany Miller
- Nov 15
- 4 min read
Do you ever feel like you're constantly playing catch-up, even when you're working harder than everyone else?
Maybe your to-do list feels never-ending, even paralyzing, your brilliant ideas get lost in a sea of good intentions, or you struggle to turn that "someday" project into an actual "today" task.
My Journey | Learning to Embrace my Creative Chaos
I was an A-B student that worked harder than my peers to get things done and perform out of necessity. I spent most of my life feeling like I was drowning and stuck in my head.
I would hear from others that I was "unreliable," "careless," "forgetful." I missed birthdays, lost important items, and carried anxiety that I would would forget something important or miss a deadline. I was told that I didn't care - when I deeply did.
Before ever receiving my ADHD diagnosis at 35, I had spend my life building structures and using strategies that work with my brain that help me get things done, combat procrastination, and stay organized. This allowed me to achieve my Masters, have a successful career at NC State, and navigate relationships and the demands of motherhood.
It made me deeply interested in neuroscience and helping children and adults navigate their challenges through their unique strengths without judgement.
If you see yourself in my story, I invite you to learn with me. Every brain is unique; everyone has struggles and strengths regardless of any diagnosis. I want to help you see and support you without the guilt, the narratives, and the unfair shame.
What Exactly Are Executive Functions?
Executive functions are the high-level cognitive skills of the upper portion of our brains that manage, organize, and direct all your other mental processes. They drive how you view, understand, navigate, and engage in the world around you.
This powerful internal management system helps you:
Plan and Prioritize: Figure out what needs to get done and in what order.
Initiate Tasks: Actually start that daunting project.
Manage Time: Estimate, allocate, and stick to schedules.
Stay Organized: Keep track of your belongings, information, and ideas.
Focus and Resist Distraction: Maintain attention on what's important.
Control Impulses: Think before you speak or act.
Regulate Emotions: Respond thoughtfully, not reactively.
Switch Gears: Adapt when plans change or you need to shift focus.
Remember Details: Hold information in your mind while you're working.
What do the struggles feel like?
I've worked with a lot of women who feel frustrated, overwhelmed, and at times embarrassed by challenges that feel unique to them. But these struggles are incredibly common - especially with all the demands placed on women.
Do any of these sound familiar?
The "Good Intentions" Trap: You want to get organized, start that new hobby, or finally tackle the clutter, but initiating the first step feels impossible.
Deadline Drama: Constantly missing deadlines, underestimating how long tasks take, or feeling rushed and stressed.
The Disappearing Act: Your keys, wallet, phone, important documents – they all seem to vanish when you need them most.
Mental Overload: Your mind feels cluttered, you forget details easily, and multi-step instructions go in one ear and out the other.
"Squirrel!" Syndrome: You start a task, get distracted, jump to another, and by the end of the day, you've done a lot of doing, but accomplished very little.
Emotional Rollercoaster: Minor setbacks trigger intense frustration or overwhelm, making it hard to bounce back.
Decision Paralysis: Faced with too many choices, you do nothing at all.
You're not lazy, unmotivated, or unintelligent. Your brain is just wired differently, and it needs a specialized toolkit to thrive in today's demanding world.
Executive Function Coaching: Your Personal Brain Optimizer
Imagine having a dedicated partner who helps you unpack through your personal experiences exactly how your brain works, and how to utilize your unique strengths to address your challenges.
That's what executive function coaching provides. It's not therapy, and it's not just about giving you a list of general tips that may or may not work for you. You can find those in blogs! It's about helping you understand and support YOU with the goal of setting you up for a lifetime of self-driven support.
My goal in coaching is to set you up with deeper self-understanding so you no longer need me.
Here's what EF coaching offers you:
Personalized Strategies: We don't believe in one-size-fits-all solutions. We'll explore your unique brain, identifying your strengths and challenges to create systems that actually stick.
Turning Struggles into Systems: We'll help you dissect those overwhelming tasks, identify what motivates you to action, and build habits that lead to consistent progress, not just temporary fixes.
Enhanced Productivity (and Peace of Mind): Learn to manage your time, prioritize effectively, and conquer procrastination so you can achieve your goals with less stress and more confidence.
Greater Clarity and Focus: Develop techniques to minimize distractions, sustain attention, and bring your best self to every task.
Empowerment and Self-Understanding: Gain invaluable insights into your own cognitive processes, empowering you to advocate for yourself and navigate life's complexities with greater ease.
Ready for something different?
If you're tired of feeling overwhelmed, constantly stressed, or like you're just not reaching your full potential, it's time to explore executive function coaching for a deeper self-understanding and personalized structures that naturally sustain.
Private Adult and Family Executive Function Coaching
We offer a complimentary 30-minute initial consultation to discuss your unique challenges, explore your goals, and see if our coaching approach is the right fit for you. It's a risk-free opportunity to learn how you can start optimizing your brain's "operating system" for a more organized, productive, and fulfilling life.
Small Community Executive Function Coaching
While personalized one-on-one coaching provides the deepest level of customization, we also offer cost-effective small group coaching options designed to build community for adults who share similar goals and challenges. Sharing your weekly goals and wins with a committed peer group and guiding executive function coach also significantly increases your follow-through. You will hear how others implement the strategies, troubleshoot challenges, and adapt techniques to fit their unique lives.
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